coping with missed career opportunites as a milspouse

I, like many other military spouses have had to deal with the missed career opportunities due to having to PCS. Recently, my husband and I, and our two cats PCSed to Virginia from Texas. We all know how stressful it is to pack up cars, kids, pets, and ourselves and move 1000+ miles to another state. Then you have to find somewhere to live whether it be in base, renting off base, or buying a house. I’ve been trying to find work within all this chaos and it’s been hard.

It can be hard to find employment as a military spouse. We don’t stay in one place for very long. That affects potential employment aspects as well as promotions within a company. These failed employment aspects and failed promotions affect how much experience we get from a job. This lack of experience will also affect you years down the line. And you might think you’re lucky if you find a remote job that allows you to work anywhere, but telling your boss you need a month off from work in order to PCS might be a little hard. In some cases, spouses don’t have the same protections that military members do you might end up getting let go for not being able to work.

Sometimes we’re told, “That’s just how it is.” Luckily, it’s getting better for us spouses in terms of government action, but it can still be hard sometimes to navigate careers. If you ever find yourself in this situation, here are some things that you can do to cope.

Be nice to yourself and allow yourself to grieve. It’s okay to feel sad, angry, disappointed, or even resentful from being turned down for employment or promotion. Give yourself permission to experience these emotions in a compassionate, non-judgemental way. Give yourself some time to grieve this missed opportunity.

Seek support. I guarantee that you aren’t the only one that has had to navigate career issues. I’ve had to deal with it and I’ve known others that have dealt with it too. This individuals are able to offer empathy, advice, and resources that you may have not known about.

Adapt

As a military spouse, it’s important to be flexible. This also includes our careers. Try to find a career that could be done remotely like data entry, or jobs that are needed everywhere like healthcare. Your career goals should also change and adapt as you continue being a military spouse.

Network

There’s a large community of military spouses out there. There is also a large community of veterans and veteran families that have had similar challenges. Use these communities to your advantage and build yourself a network of professionals that you meet. Not only will this allow you to stay informed about potential job openings, it’ll help you discover alternative career opportunities.

Consider self-employment

Being a freelancer provides flexibility and control over your career. Being a freelancer means that you can work anywhere and it gives you the ability to start and stop your work when you need the time off. But, please stay away from multi-level marketing schemes (MLM) such as: Herbalife, Amway, Avon, Mary Kay, Scentsy, or any company that makes you sell to your friends and family.

Use your resources

Sometimes us spouses aren’t told about all the resources that we have at our disposal and here are some that you can use for yourself to help your career:

Miltary & Family Readiness Center - These centers sometimes host events and classes pertaining to employment assistance, financial readiness, and relocation. The center at my base recently hosted a class on resume writing and interviewing techniques.

Military One Source at https://www.militaryonesource.mil/  - This site isn’t just for career help. It’ll help you with all aspects of military life concering child care, finances, peer support, relocation, and non-medical counseling. Military Onesource can help you connect with businesses that hire military spouses and it gives career guidance and provides education.

And last of all, be patient and positive. Don’t let a missed career opportunity discourage you from pursuing a career. We all know that military life involves a lot of challenges and uncertainty. You’ve got a lot of time ahead of you. You don’t need to race to the finish line.

Trying to have a successful career as a military spouse is difficult. But being a military spouse offers valuable experiences and career opportunities that you probably wouldn’t find anywhere else. You can still achieve your career goals even while being a military spouse by being proactive, flexible, and kind to yourself.

Disclaimer: The content provided on this mental health blog is for informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for professional advice or treatment. Always consult with a qualified mental health professional for personalized guidance. The blog owner and authors are not responsible for any actions taken based on the information provided on this blog.

If you are in a crisis, please contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 988 or visit your local Emergency Room for assistance.

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